Feeling a Little More Depressed Than Normal

 It seems like I have been back sliding in lots of ways at the moment. It seemed like I was doing alright with starting to save money for a bankruptcy lawyer and the nonsense that goes along with it but I am not fully sure what happened though. Maybe I started to get a little reckless. The recent Luckyscent purchase of Pichola was reckless and it doesn't matter if I used Afterpay or not, it was still reckless. My budget was a whopping total of $50 and it was a gift card through Afterpay, That was a little on the reckless side, I probably could have made due with only $25. But there were a couple Ulta orders that would be okay but would have been better off not spending that at all. I will admit that it felt good to actually pay my cellphone bill in full and on time for 2 months in a row. I struggled with the cellphone bill. I would always be waiting until a week after my cellphone bill was due to make a partial payment and then on my next paycheck, pay the rest of it.

The last of my packages came today, I am going to see what I can do to get myself back on track. First thing is to work on paying off my Afterpay balance. While I am working on the Afterpay balance, I have to work on getting back to basics in terms of spending. That means that I either have to fully stop any kind of frivolous spending or cut way back on it. I am not fully sure on why my depression felt worse. Every time my depression gets the better of me, I do have the tendency to do some retail therapy. Getting a package in the mail can give me something to look forward to but I can't do that so much anymore. The only thing is that my dad's birthday is in August and I am still picking my brain on what to get him. So I am working on banking my Rewarded Play point balance so I am able to pick out something on Amazon. I was thinking about an Xbox game but something else might catch my fancy.

This is some of the issue with Afterpay, you would be amazed on how many things become more "affordable". Yes, there is no  interest but it lets me pay for things in 4 installments and I have to pay every 2 weeks. It's great until you have a bigger balance and all these payments to make. It might be a wise idea to take the Afterpay app off of my phone when I pay Afterpay off. Then I cannot use Afterpay if I have less access to it.

The health insurance that I have only covers so much. I don't know how mental health has become to be viewed as something that should be limited. Just like I have teeth that need crowns, health insurance considers that cosmetic. So I am limited on where I can go when it comes to therapy if I want to get as much therapy as I can possibly get.